I woke to a beautiful morning full of sunshine and warm breezes! I'm going to work in the yard today and I am going to bring the two hounds outside to enjoy the day while I work.
I am a foolish woman.
1. Bring both dogs outside and hook to the yard runs.
2. Untangle dogs from yard runs and return inside to get water bowl for them.
3. Put full water bowl down carefully. Untangle dogs from yard runs again.
4. Refill water dish and tell dogs to stop being crazy.
5. Untangle dogs from yard runs. Go get large lawn bin for yard debris.
6. Stop one dog from eating sticks. Take front foot off of overturned water dish.
7. Refill water dish. Tell dogs to cut it out!
8. Start picking up small tree limbs and sticks, putting them in the lawn debris bin.
9. Stop one dog from digging a hole. Tell dog "no digging!”.
10. Stop other dog from eating large clumps of moss. Tell dog “no moss!”
11. Return to cleaning up the yard.
12. Untangle dogs from yard runs (again?!). Tell dogs you will NOT refill the water dish.
13. Watch dogs jump and spin for no reason then attack each other for fun.
14. Leave water dish upside down. Return to cleaning up the yard.
15. Stop one dog from eating dirt from large planter.
16. Notice other dog is wrapped tight to tree by yard run…snicker and return to work leaving dog pinned to tree.
17. Begin work removing old stakes from the garden. Retrieve stakes from dogs mouth. Place back in pile.
18. Untangle second dog that is pinned to the tree. Tell her she is an idiot. Dogs tail continues to wag.
19. Wooden stakes are scattered across the yard by the other dog. Place back into one pile. Begin removing fencing from around the garden.
20. Stop dogs from barking non-stop at out of reach squirrel.
21. Untangle both mutts from yard runs!
22. Retrieve water bowl from nearby bush. Return to garden work.
23. Stop dogs from eating dead plants from the garden. Stare at dogs while dogs stare back.
24. Ask dogs: Why are you both so stupid? Dogs response: wag entire body happily while jumping in the air and giving out tiny yips of pleasure.
25. Acknowledge defeat; take dogs in the house...watching them track dirt across the clean carpet.
26. Pour a glass of wine and sit in favorite chair while dogs deposit mucky wet bones; tennis balls and squeaky toys in your lap.
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